Question: I am currently initiated, practicing Krishna Consciousness for the last 10 years and married. However even after my marriage, I am attracted to men other than my husband who are both devotees and sometimes non-devotees due to their qualities of speaking or some other qualities.
This disturbs my chanting and my spiritual progress. I feel not to do it but still somehow get attracted.
How do I overcome this attraction and stay fixed in Krishna consciousness?
I don’t want to fall. How do I help myself?
Answer by Romapada Swami:
Krsna in BG 2.62, describes that by contemplating sense objects, attachment and desires develop; and when the desires are not fulfilled, it further leads to anger, bewilderment of memory, loss of intelligence etc.
Srila Prabhupada mentions in the purport to BG 2.64, “ It is already explained that one may externally control the senses by some artificial process, but unless the senses are engaged in the transcendental service of the Lord, there is every chance of a fall. Although the person in full Kṛṣṇa consciousness may apparently be on the sensual plane, because of his being Kṛṣṇa conscious he has no attachment to sensual activities. The Kṛṣṇa conscious person is concerned only with the satisfaction of Kṛṣṇa, and nothing else.”
While devotional service is very powerful and purifying, it also depends on the sadhaka’s sincerity of practice. We all must make gradual but steady steps in our spiritual journey to develop the pure desire to love and serve Supreme Lord Krsna. Due to our long association with material energy, ‘from time immemorial’, we are deeply conditioned and therefore cleansing the mind and training it to think of Krishna takes prolonged, attentive, and deliberate practice with the intention to please Guru and Krsna.
As practicing devotees, we naturally have some attraction for Krsna, His Holy Name and devotees. However, that attachment has to be carefully nourished by the process of devotional service.
Below are few things which will help strengthen one’s attachment and attraction towards Krsna:
- Read Srila Prabhupada books regularly with your husband if possible. This will help increase your spiritual Krishna conscious bonding with him. It will also help improve your internal contemplation on His wonderful all-attractive qualities. In turn, this will help you remember Srila Prabhupada’s instructions and his mood and mission – which is to introduce Krishna consciousness to all conditioned souls.
It is mentioned in SB 1.2.17 for those who are engaged in eagerly hearing the messages of Krishna which are virtuous in themselves, the Lord Himself being seated in their hearts will personally cleanse the desire for sense enjoyment. Further, it is mentioned in SB 1.2.19 that lust is gradually eliminated by this same process.
- Going deeper in your chanting. One should chant very prayerfully, and with the right motivation and intensity to only please and serve the Lord and with no other desire to enjoy separately from Krsna.
- Associate with senior devotees who inspire you in your devotional life. Seek their guidance in confidence.
- If possible, engage in deity worship service. It helps purify one’s mind and senses. Srila Prabhupada writes in the purport to SB 11.27.1 “ In addition to performing their prescribed duties, devotees of the Lord engage in regulated worship of the Lord in His Deity form in the temple. Such worship acts powerfully to cleanse the heart of both the lust to enjoy one’s material body and the material family attachment that results directly from this lust.”
