Question: What is the cause of self pity? How can we overcome it?
Answer by Romapada Swami :
Self pity stems from improper understanding of the self. The self, or spirit soul, is fully satisfied and secure by virtue of his relationship with Krishna. The pure soul is decorated with all auspicious qualities and is unfettered by any material limitation.
But in the conditioned state, the soul is overcome by many unfortunate circumstances. Generally, one tries by various means to counteract the reversals in life and works hard to fulfill their unending desires. Sometimes however, due to repeated frustration, one may feel overwhelmed by the odds against them and baffled in all their attempts to enjoy, and this often gives way to lamentation and self-pity.
Indulging in self-pity can be rather destructive and one should seek active and positive alternatives to address the immediate cause(s), if any, that lies behind it. However, the ultimate remedy is to actually address the root cause, and be situated in proper knowledge of our spiritual self, and of our relationship with Krishna. One who takes shelter in Krishna as the ultimate controller and our best well-wishing friend can be always cheerful. (cf. Bg 5.29)
Rather than being preoccupied by one’s misfortunes, feeling gratitude in acknowledgement of our assets (you might be surprised how many assets we each have that we have not noticed or have taken for granted!) and feeling deep gratitude in the heart for these resources that the Lord has kindly provided – this is an exercise that can immediately lift one out of self-pity. The lives of so many great devotees like the Pandavas, Draupadi, Mother Saci and others, all checkered by a series of reversals, time and again teach a valuable lesson – a simple and grateful heart is a happy heart.
