Question : In my service as a Nama Hatta co-ordinator in my geographical area I am having difficulty in discovery of the envious and proud nature of some of the devotees. Whilst they are wonderful, and eager to attend the weekly program, engage in some service and chant, still some make an added effort to flaunt their pride and also cannot help themselves in respect of enviousness.
I have tried to see it as my own anarthas and thus continuously overlook these things in others, instead addressing it in myself. But it is for the other devotees that are trying to grow in Krishna Consciousness that I worry for.
Example, we have a mataji who is an excellent cook and financially better off than many in the group. She would always want to out-do the others and subtly (sometimes very openly) put down others in this respect. Her husband who is an enthusiastic fellow when engaged in service, cannot stop himself from preaching simplicity and humility but at the same time brag about his material good-fortune with much exaggeration.
The others find it very dis-tasteful and annoying to the degree that two devotees proposed not coming back.
If I address the matter directly, I risk losing this couple. If I leave it as it is and hope for the best, then I risk losing others. I have had senior vaisnavas speak on topics addressing envy and pride. The result is, “this is for the others not for me…”. Please help with some direction.
Answer by Romapada Swami :
This is a very practical question you have put forward and this situation may be applicable to many congregations.
Your attitude of trying to see good in others and to address the anarthas within yourself is befitting a Vaishnava. You are also concerned about others’ welfare, as a Vaishnava leader.
To address your inquiry, in general, devotee leaders depend on the purifying potency of the Holy Name, and encourage congregation members and other devotees by example – to deepen their relationship with the Holy Name, by developing strong sadhana, humbly serving the Vaisnavas and assisting in spreading the glories of the Holy Name.
Then, the Holy Name will eradicate all anarthas in due course of time.
In specific, about the couple you have mentioned, they seem to be sincere in performing their services. As you have noted, directly addressing these matters of anarthas with devotees may break their heart and discourage them in devotional service. It may become a case of, “operation successful but patient dead!”
They will have to realize their shortcomings themselves, through the example of other devotees and inspiration from Guru and the Paramatma.
The leaders can try to create a culture where realizations based on critical self-evaluation are fostered through loving realtionships amongst devotees.
You mentioned that you have had senior vaisnavas speak on topics addressing envy and pride. This is one of the proper things to do and should continue. Even if it may not have had visible effects on them right now, it is helping others in the congregation. If the mood of the congregation changes, it will eventually affect this couple also, as long as they keep associating.
As a concerned leader towards the devotee couple one course of action you can take, is to confidentially inquire about their sadhana schedule and encourage them in improving their sadhana, by improving the quality of their chanting and reading of Srila Prabhupada’s books.
Another practical suggestion could be to ask them to take care of 1 or 2 junior couples in your congregation, under your monitoring and guidance. This means that they should guide the junior couple(s) in their spiritual lives, and give you reports of their progress. In this way, they may feel motivated to set proper example of sadhana and behavior.
In due course of time, they will become involved in the junior couples’ lives. At this time, when they encounter the junior couples’ shortcomings in a more direct way, probably they may be able to relate to how others may have been affected by their own attitude. Thus, by practically experiencing this effect, they might resolve to change their attitude.
From time-to-time, you can also take feedback from the 2 junior couples they are guiding. When this couple gives you reports of the junior couples, you may have an opportunity to address the issues of pride and envy in a general sense.
In any case, if they are engaged in this way, in taking care of Lord Caitanya’s devotees, Lord Caitanya will personally take care of them.
Apart from this, pray to the Lord and beg Him for the right wisdom. With humility at heart and good wishes for the couple, seek the shelter of Guru & Gauranga for spiritual strength and mercy. In this way, you will be inspired to do the right thing with the right attitude.
