Question: My relationship with my mother has considerably improved. Even though we do not fight as much, we still argue quite a lot and we do sometimes fight, but for the time being it’s quite peaceful. How can I improve my relationship with my mother?
Answer by Romapada Swami:
In addition to what you are already doing, which are major steps forward, here are some additional recommendations.
- Replace Familiarity with Respect.
- Honor the fact that your parents are devotees, who have given you all encouragement and facility for devotional service by their association and their care for you. Gratitude should fill your heart! Without them, where would your devotional life be???
- AS YOU ARE LESS THAN PERFECT, YET WOULD LIKE TO BE APPRECIATED FOR YOUR SINCERE EFFORTS TO IMPROVE — extend the same courtesy to your parents. DO NOT EXPECT THEM TO BE PERFECT.
- Take spiritual strength from your sadhana, and apply it to your relationships at home. Treat family members as vaisnavas.
- Be self-honest: namely, a major part of teenage stuff with parents is hormonal, plus “transitioning from dependence to independence”. Do not blame them; recognize, honestly, that a lot of the turmoil with parents is simply “teenage stuff”.
- Remind yourself “While I may not like xyz interactions, deep inside I know that my parents love me very much.”
